Well

After about a week.. my energy is slowly leaving me. Im really lonely, i miss connecting with someone and im not sure how to fix it. It seems everyones busy and/or I scare people away. I just want to chat and I know it sounds really pathetic but Im truly lonely.

Im trying to stay away from all those people I know would only hurt me yet... it's getting to be so hard.

I really miss Alan but im starting to get used to the idea of him being gone. I just assume hes only gonna stop by once a week for about five minutes.. that will end up being two weeks and then we'll drift apart like we did before.

Maybe its for the better.. who knows but im still very lonely and drifting and it just sucks.. big time.