If you see Him tell Him...

You've seen me and i'm doing better

That there's Someone by my side

with whom i fell in love

Days have gone by

and i havent even realised how fast

That my sleep is still here

and that im over Us

Tell Him im doing great

That ive never been better

That if He thinks im dying because He's not here

let Him think that

Tell Him that in in the end id be grateful to Him

Thinking again.. tell Him you dont see me anymore

If you see Him tell Him i dont expect His call anymore

Tell Him i dont wake up in the middle of the night

Tell i dont remember who He is and that i dont need Him

Tell Him i healed and that Our story is in the past

Tell Him im doing great

That ive never been better

That if He thinks im dying because He's not here

Let Him think that

Tell Him that in the end id be grateful to Him

Thinking again.. tell Him you dont see me anymore

And tell Him that im doing great (even though i know very well im not)

That ive never been better (lie for me please)

That if He thinks im dying because He's not here

let Him think that (dont lie to Him anymore)
Tell Him that in the end id be grateful to Him

Thinking again.. tell Him you dont see me anymore

The text above is a song.. yes a sad one..it expresses some of this girl's feelings... she's been feeling pretty bad.. not only mentally but physically... she believes that the physical pain is partly a consequence of her mental state..

This is like the 4th time she tries posting in here so hopefully will succeed now... lots and lots of things happened this weekend.. both related to this and nilla word .. oh and did she mention she cant get rid of this dam headache???? thought was a hangover at first.. due to a prty she had sunday's nite but no.. tis tuesday's nite and still here... my new best friend as told someone today.. a girl keeps asking herself what is it that she finds in drinking that attracts her so much.. she doesnt need to tell the truth to Aanyone.. she was with her freinds so didnt need anything not to be so shy.. maybe cuz allows me to avoid reality and this girl sometimes just needs that.. still she hates feeling that way.... she misses Him but she wants to move on and be able to let go.. and every time shes about to do so something comes up... it got nasty on saturday's nite wth her friends at her house... we were only four but more than enough to end up with a break up and a girl crying.. (who wasnt this girl lol for once ) two drunk ppl.. yeah unfortunately this girl part of that along ng with the crying girl's boyfriend.. sighs.. this girl's friend realised her boyfriend was lots more alike this girl than her... she got all worries .. and they broke up today which made a girl more sad.. well out of nilla word for a while... back to this... things gotten more clear in the last couple hours... i loved Him with all my heart.... a part of me still does... and will always do so but need to move on and want to move on...

sighs.. tis late so will have to keep working on this tomorrow as soon as she gets back home from school..

ack.. she hates doing this but shes too tired and headache still wif me :( hopefully wont forget what she wants to get out ..