Some thoughts

"when you stare into someones soul and can truly connect you can see the beauty of their darkness as well as the light that keeps them going"

This quote belongs to someone who was very special to me.. I dont know whether he made it up or stole it from somewhere.. He had a little problem telling the truth you know, we all know the kind and we all hope we never come across one of those ever or ever again in my case. I have to say though he was both the worst and best thing that could happen to me. He brought out the slave in me if He had only invested the time He invested in lying in bettering himself, well damn Id have been one of the luckiest people on the earth. You might be wondering what brought all this up, and there's no a simple answer to that (of course nothing is as simple with me) I talked to a close friend of mine, Ive known her for over a year now, curiously or not so much, she is or was related to the person who wrote the quote above in a journal we used to have. This friend of mine was answering some of the questions I had and some of the wishes and hopes I have. Among other things we talked about bisexuality and poly relationships, two touchy subjects for me for I never experienced any of them. I tried to explain her how scary it was for me to give everything up and let someone close to me since that same thing was what made me vulnerable to players. Thing is now i did let someone very close to me, at times I think closer than I intended when i first met him. You might be wondering what the issue is, well let me answer that for you, when i was first introduced to this world I was way too new and way too naive, the person i was with knew this, I didnt know about players online, liars, cheaters, etc, looking back.. it was a big fat mistake from my part, why? simple, if that kinda people exist in the real world why wouldnt they exist in the cyber world if real people make the online world? Of course I didnt think of that back then, to my favor I must add I do now. There's a big defect I have regarding this, I believe in good, I believe in good in people nad have the hardest time thinking some dont have feelings and dont mind hurting others. I guess that's part of the problem in this society we live nowadays, unfortunately I cant fix that, no matter how hard I try to make others see through my eyes or at least see through the person they're about to hurt eyes. It's called empathy, we'd be so much better if only a few of us tried that more often. (edit: i should learn not to stop writing when im in the mood to do so) (needs to be completed)